you told me you loved me
why did you leave me, all alone
now you tell me you need me
im already gone.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
;
12:21 PM
I could really use a wish right now.
Salutations.
I feel all I need is a break. Just one day that the school gives us, to take time off school and to just relax. But, like that's ever gonna happen. Haiz. I didn't expect Year 2 to be so stressful. I am incomprehensibly exhausted. The work, and the assignments, and the IGs, and the CE Talks, and the UTs; and on top of that quizzes and RJs and CE Talk RJs plus giving tuition. Yikes!
I'm 18 already, and yet I feel like a total nerd. Not liberating my legal self yet. And Mirul, he's so cute with his Year 1 talk. He, Hafsah (Ni'mah's sister) and Wan, all asking me bout Year 1 and what is was like. I'm glad I have knowledge and wisdom to impart. Haha. Mirul loves doing RJs, and he's already started with his writing of notes for the UTs.
Well, right now, I'm supposed to be studying for the UT. But I just needed to blog first. Since, now, my faci, HI ANDREW!, has my blog address. :) I need some cheering up, and something to take my mind off school for once. Hmmm... maybe I'll just stare at the giant Man United poster in my room (hehehe) or the giant Cristiano Ronaldo poster too (^^). Let me give you a brief idea of what they look like.
Nice, right?!!! I KNOW! I get to stare at them all day. HAHAHAHA. Okay, now that cheered me up. Time to go study. Auf Wiedersehen.
Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars?
=DeBbIe=
you are my past ; now, im my everything
Monday, May 03, 2010
;
10:02 PM
I'm living in denial of the world around me.
Where do I go when there is absolutely no where to go? No one to turn to. You would think one's mind would be a sanctuary during a time like this. But, no. It's the cause of my denial, of my confusion, of my doubt. To feel yourself slipping off the edge, and having no rope to pull you back. To start thinking that everything I have vowed for is a lie.
I wish I didn't feel this way. I wish I never thought this way. But, I'm too far gone. I yearn so much for someone to save me. And to see that no one can. Not even God. It's a scary feeling, being all alone to fight this. Waging war with myself. I can only crawl back within my empty soul, and hide there.
But how do I tell people? I don't wanna disappoint my family. My friends since young. My dad. I couldn't bear for people to blame him for all this. I wish I could make this all better, as if it never happened, but I can't. Only I can fight this now. Alone.
Somebody save me.
Debbie.
you are my past ; now, im my everything
